I don’t know if you can handle us Asian guys…
Asian guys are just like other guys in that they come in all shapes, sizes, and personalities. American media will try to stereotype us as either geeks or comedians or martial artists, but Asians guys are so diverse and multifaceted. It’s very apparent if you watch movies or TV shows from Asia. They can be rebels, funny, romantic, intelligent, mysterious, sensitive, thoughtful, and so much more.
Despite the diversity, I think that there are some common positive traits that Asian guys tend to have due to common cultural influences and upbringing. Especially since Asian countries tend to focus on community and familial thinking, many of these traits deal with maintaining harmony in relationships. What that means for the ladies is that Asian guys are good at getting along and they aren’t as self-centered as some American guys. Here are 5 traits that most Asian men I know exhibit.
1. Hardworking – Asians men are raised with a strong work ethic because many immigrant parents realize that the only way to compete in a foreign country is to work your yellow ass off! Continue reading
Caption: "I hate my Asian brother because he doesn't have blue eyes"
I’ve heard this in real life, and I’ve also read it online. Some Asian American females will actually say this! “I don’t want to date Asian men because they remind me of my brother or father.” This is really weird to me because the only women who say this are Asian American women. What gives? I’ve never heard a black girl say that, a hispanic girl, nor any white girls. Doesn’t make any sense, you know? Is it because in some parts of the US there are way less Asians than Blacks and Hispanics? Perhaps if this Asian American female lived in Utah all her life, and the only Asian guys she knew were her brother and father, then it might kind of make sense but it’s still a crazy broad association. But, how can you not know Asians outside of your home these days? Asians are friggin’ everywhere! You go to any city, and you’ll see a Chinatown. You go to every other restaurant and it’s Asian owned. You can pick up a rock on a beach and you’ll find an Asian or two underneath.
When an Asian American girl says this, what they are actually admitting is that they have been whitewashed by America. What they are actually saying is that Asian guys all look alike! (Wow. It’s one thing when a white person says this, but when a fellow Asian says this, it’s a shock. ) They haven’t made enough male friends in the Asian community to see the different personality types. They just see colors: yellow, white, black, brown. They probably watched 90210 growing up with her white girlfriends and actually believe that Dylan and Brandon are what a boyfriend should look like. These AA girls fail to realize that they have no resemblance to Brenda or Kelly. Continue reading
"Why have you forsaken us? Where's the love Asian ladies?"
So I’ve met and talked to many Asian women in my lifetime and I’ve gathered some ideas over the years. The question I’ve posed to them is this: “How come you don’t want to date or marry an Asian man?” Here are some reasons given to me personally by various Asian women.
1. My favorite of all time – Because Asian men, especially the Korean guys, smell like garlic
2. I just prefer round-eyes rather than slant-eyes
3. They don’t do anything but drink, gamble, smoke, and watch ESPN – I want someone to go camping, hiking, and paragliding across the Amazon rainforest with
4. They are controlling, possessive, and the jealous-type
5. They expect my ass to cook for them, wash their clothes, and clean the house
6. I swear I saw his mom scrub his back in the bathtub
7. He doesn’t like to ”downtown” on me but rather go to Chinatown with his buddies
"I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt, too sexy it huuuurts"
Reading a comment by zhangxiaoxiong in the The Fear of Rejection
article, he made a great point that I wanted to expand on. A lot of us SAMs are Late Bloomers.
The problem with this is that by the time you’ve decided to try dating, you have the adult, uptight, and serious mentality. If you had started when you were younger, you were probably more flexible, carefree, didn’t think about marriage, and you were just having fun. But, starting when you’re 20 (or 30 or even 40), it’s quite frightening, and it feels like more is at stake. But, whether you start young or late, you have to go through the rejections if you really want a great partner. There’s no way around it. I think that dating and relationships is mostly about feel, and real experience cannot be replaced. That’s why I gawk when I hear about virgin SAMs who want to marry quickly despite not having real relationship experiences.
Why do many SAMs start dating late? A big part of it is because a lot of us were raised by strict parents who didn’t encourage dating. We were told to study…ALL the time! Any time we spent time playing games or hanging out, we’d be berated by our parents. “You’re wasting time! Go study!” Never was I ever encouraged to date girls, or have girls over. So, I was too embarrassed to do it, and so I never did. My parents weren’t affectionate either, so that didn’t help either. When watching TV with the family and a hot, kissing scene would come on, I would pretend that I wasn’t watching. (I would suddenly start reading the TV Guide like it was a bible!) I was SO uptight when I went to college that my voice would quiver when I had to speak with women. Continue reading
"This is what I've wanted ever since I was a little Asian boy"
I’ve slept with quite a few women in the past. I’m not bragging because I have nothing to brag about. I’m sure many guys have much higher numbers than me. But there was a period where I was simply the biggest skank whore you can imagine. The thing is, I just didn’t give a fuck. I wanted to experience it all. Before I was a bit naive, inexperienced, slightly sexually repressed, and way too jaded. And yes, I felt that I would carry some guilt if I just slept with a girl in a non-meaningful relationship. But I realized I didn’t want anything meaningful or serious at the moment. I wanted to have fun and I didn’t want to deprive myself of this fun. And it was a period where I just wanted to date and not discriminate too much, meaning, not be too picky. Because this was simply ‘dating’, which is a euphemism for ‘waxing that ass’. And yes, I’ve been dumped by bitches that I don’t even like all that much and I’ve dumped a handful of bitches as well. It goes both ways. Continue reading
Uhhh…hell yeah! Just joking. I’m not sure. This is an impossible question to answer for us SAMs at least merely because SAMs don’t ever try to date Black women. And maybe vice versa. I’ve never seen an Asian guy date a Black woman.
"Hey everybody, let's stick together, forever"
SAMs are like wolves…they move in packs. Yes, I find this very interesting, because I always liked to do stuff on my own, even though I have lots of friends. Growing up, I’d spend hours doing art or playing the guitar by myself. Even when I started playing sports, I tended to play individual sports like tennis, though I did play soccer. In college, I made some Korean American friends, and they’d ALWAYS ask me to come out, and I’d say no half the time just because they did the same things or they did stuff I wasn’t down with. I don’t mind going to bars to smoke and drink, but if you do it every damn night, forget it. And, we’re not freakin’ Power Rangers who have to be together all the time! These days, I look around, and it’s the same thing; a bunch of my SAM friends going out on the town, usually without any girls! So, it seems like SAMs move in packs like wolves, but unfortunately, they don’t know how to hunt!
These are the questions we address here – these are the difficult questions we as SAMs must ask ourselves every freakin’ single day.
Why aren’t we out there dating?
Why are we so passive with women?
Why are we so picky? Why do we have so much pride?
Why do we make so many excuses for being single for so long?
Why do we lose Asian women to white guys? Why do so many Asian women date outside of their race but why don’t we do the same?
Why in God’s name are so many of us in our late 20’s/early 30’s still virgins?
Why don’t SAMs ever get laid? Ever!!! Why do so many SAMs I know say they have a big penis…..compared to other SAMs?
Where is our Asian Johnny Depp? Or Asian Brad Pitt? Or Asian George Clooney? Continue reading
"I am the perfect Asian wife"
Why are some SAM’s who are in their late 20′s/early 30′s so damn picky? Why on earth would you limit your potential pool of chicks? Some want a beautiful Korean girl. Some want someone who is Harvard-educated. And others want a girl who is NOT a slut. Well you know what? You aint gettin’ no booty from an Ivy League Korean supermodel/actress/pop singer, aight? Wake up dawg! Have you seen yourself naked in the mirror lately? Unless you look like an Asian Brad Pitt, you’re going to have to resort to anything that walks or has a pulse; as long as the chick has a cooch. For the fellas who are not looking for a nice little wife, it’s about the poon… Continue reading