This is a sensitive topic that will probably bring out a lot of pain in our SAM readers across the globe! Sorry to pour salt in your wounds, boys. And, just when your scabs were forming!
SCENARIO: You’re in a relationship and you’re really diggin’ the girl. You feel like you click on that special wavelength, and your heart is pounding all the time. You have pictures of her on your cellphone, and you can actually see yourself with this girl for the rest of your life. But then, the relationship progresses in the wrong direction. She doesn’t answer her phone as often, she seems to always be busy, and you have suspicions that she’s dating that guy she works with. Then, one day, she says, “I don’t want to see you anymore. We’re done.” You try to salvage the relationship but she isn’t having it. You think about all the great times you had, the many hours you spent together, not to mention the money!! (I had a friend who was a businessman who put so much money into a relationship that he didn’t want to walk away. He wanted at least an 8% return on his investment!)
After being dumped, you lose your appetite, and you get drunk every night with your SAM buddies that you’ve ignored for over a year. You can’t help but wallow in your misery. You are emotionally scarred, and you are obsessed about trying to figure out why she dumped your sorry SAM ass! Was I too nice? Was I too mean? Was I not good enough in bed? Did she get turned off when I used that coupon at dinner? Your confidence drops, and you feel like a loser.
In my opinion, it’s the best thing that can happen to a SAM. Seriously. Only when you feel that intense pain can you really appreciate relationships and how fragile they are. You learn so much from a failed relationship that it’s priceless for your development. It’s the most humanizing experience you’ll ever have, and it’ll make you grow tenfold. When I got dumped, it shattered my ego, and I was down for months. But, I finally understood that despite my mistakes, we weren’t compatible, and there was no way I could’ve forced a different outcome. Those six months of hell made me a better man. Eventually, I was able to forgive and forget her. Having learned a lot from that failed relationship, I have found somebody else who is much more compatible, and I’m really happy how it all turned out. A lot of people are afraid to take risks because they don’t want to get hurt. But, I don’t think you can feel the highs without the lows.
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