The reasons Asian women have told me why they won’t date SAM’s

asian date marry sam

"Why have you forsaken us? Where's the love Asian ladies?"


So I’ve met and talked to many Asian women in my lifetime and I’ve gathered some ideas over the years. The question I’ve posed to them is this: “How come you don’t want to date or marry an Asian man?” Here are some reasons given to me personally by various Asian women.

1. My favorite of all time – Because Asian men, especially the Korean guys, smell like garlic
2. I just prefer round-eyes rather than slant-eyes
3. They don’t do anything but drink, gamble, smoke, and watch ESPN – I want someone to go camping, hiking, and paragliding across the Amazon rainforest with
4. They are controlling, possessive, and the jealous-type
5. They expect my ass to cook for them, wash their clothes, and clean the house
6. I swear I saw his mom scrub his back in the bathtub
7. He doesn’t like to “downtown” on me but rather go to Chinatown with his buddies
8. They are so old fashion, conservative, stubborn, narrow-minded, and prideful
9. They are shorter than me when I’m in my stilettos
10. They are not as romantic as Brad Pitt or George Clooney
11. He works in a grocery store by day, fixed up his Honda Civic by night, and goes to the casino to gamble by morning
12. He can’t speak a goddamn word of English
13. I need tweezers and a flashlight to locate his Weinershnitzel
14. I’m just not attracted to Asian men period – I prefer masculine men over PokeMon
15. I like the blond/blue eye look – the All-American quarterback for the football team
16. SAMs are too shy and laid-back, besides their moms have both their testicles in a tightly shut jar up on the mantel at his mom’s house

 “That’s my fucking sister you bastard! I’m going to tell mom!”

31 thoughts on “The reasons Asian women have told me why they won’t date SAM’s

  1. Ugghh enough of this stupid topic, how many times are we going to address this issue?

    Every time you people bitch about asian girls dating white guys, you’re making everyone else look better than asian guys. Why can’t ya just admit that most of us don’t really care. The ones that do are losers who have no lives and hopeless in geting dates. Don’t count me in. But don’t make us out to be the bad guy.

    Controversial Sam, I bet you’re not even asian, you’re a troll looking to start up another boring thread with an issue that’s been posted countless times before. Dude, it’s weak.

    Personally I don’t give a rat’s ass who dates who and I certainly don’t care what an asian girl thinks that I smell like garlic.

  2. I kinda agree with the person above. Who cares what asian girls think of us? The pure fact that you are letting them get to you is very typical of a SAM. Remember for every asian girl out there that won’t date us, there are two more that would. Assert pride and confidence in yourself!

  3. Goldfish is right, but beyond that, I know and I can admit that there are asian girls who have no interest in asian men. I can live with that. I understand them and it’s not all rooted in hatred for their own kind, it just so perpetuates it. What’s happening here is that the general perception of asian girls selling out to say, white guys, is reflective of our sensitivities of self-worth. The world objectifies asian females, and they are thrust into this limelight of affection and lust. therefore, their assimilation into the majority is a relatively smooth transition. Anyhow, this topic is a desperate attempt to smear SAM’s into digging a hole someone else dug first. I have no hole to dig.

  4. Apart from #15 and 16, these reasons are pretty bull. These gals just don’t know enough SAMs.

    But I agree, SAMs need to just get over it and stop whining and obsessing. Yeah, it is completely bizarre that so many Asian women prefer fugly pink furballs, er, white guys, to hot Asian men, and it rather sucks for y’all, but stop wallowing, move on, and go for the women who will like you.

  5. yeah, i’m starting to question the point of this website. It just seems like it’s constant rants and rants about why asian women hate asian men.

  6. The people have spoken…we’ve deemed this topic as dead…let’s move on. Also, remember, feel free to submit posts and if we like ‘em we’ll post them and give you credit.

  7. bicyclethief, I’m not sure if you were trying to be funny, but that’s actually a really good idea. I mean, not really about white girls liking Asian guys, but why would any girl prefer an Asian guy over other guys.

    If we can tap into what we have that others don’t offer, and what girls like, then we can go with that, be confident with what we have and strive for the better. Wallowing in why Asian girls don’t like SAMs is very typical unproductive SAMish behaviour.

    Maybe we can boost what we have, like loyalty, or chivalry, sensitivity or careful attention to detail.

    Let’s be proud and walk with heads high SAMs!

  8. Suppose you have two daughters. You favor one and dislike the other one. One gets all the attention and the other one gets none. What do you think they’ll growing up to be like? My guess is that the less popular one will resent the popular one, and the popular one will dispise the less popular one. They’ll grow apart.

    I can’t help but draw a connection to what’s happening to Asian Americans here in the States.

  9. I agree with FightClub and Shanghai—enough already. I posted previously that you can’t do anything about the AF who won’t date you but you CAN do something about those who are willing and are interested in you. Like FightClub says, at some point, I don’t really care about who’s dating whom. Get some damn confidence and belief in yourself!

    Re-hashing this topic actually indicates deep rooted insecurities for those who continue to rant about this. AND it doesn’t portray SAM’s in a good light. Is that the how you want to present yourself to the world? I’ve thrown out some advice and suggestions to those who aren’t doing so well socially. Are you heeding that advice? If you’re unhappy with your life, then fucking take steps to change it. If you need advice, then ask. Someone around here might have some good suggestions for you. You really can’t change anyone else, but you can make changes in yourself and your responses to others. You can sit around and whine about stuff or you can take control of your life and make your life more enjoyable. The choice is yours.

    In previous threads, there was some good advice being ladled out. Perhaps the moderators need to create a room or thread somewhere to compile all kinds of advice, like a reference room. That way, any SAM who is down on his luck, feeling lost, can search thru the room/thread and find what others’ experiences have been and how they dealt with things socially, or things on physical fitness, etc…

  10. AAs gotta start giving their own women kind some fucking credit. Lot more than you think is aware of what the fuck is up. Get over it. You go for flash and that’s what you get man. Look under the Goth table cloth. Or the Drawing table. They are all over the place.

  11. The incessant ramblings ’bout this topic is truly embarassing. Your inferiority complex for all to see does make AA males look like petty jealous effeminate boys. I no longer get riled up about this though I did as a youngster. Sure I have my own condescending thoughts towards AF who, out of their emotional problems, specifically prefer a white male but c’mon, is that really a big deal? That’s their problem with their own identity.

    Btw: I am engaged to a white woman. A good woman…period. Race is no longer an issue though it was at the onset.

    If you’re so upset, go date them all…stop complaining.

    My interest in these blogs are slowly waning….

  12. There is nothing embrassing about this. How can people not be embrassed with the huge disparity, but rather at some AMs voicing their displeasures. The disparity itself is the biggest slap in the face of all AAs. If I was embrassed about anything, I’d be embrassed about that.

    A big percentage of AAs (not just Asian Americans, I think it’s all Asians) probably do have inferiority complex. We need to improve, we need to change, no doubt. But the first step is to get people angry, get people uncomfortable. Then hopefully, they’ll start thinking how can I change this situation?

    Some of you are further ahead than the others. Those of you need to encourage the others to voice their opinions and their discomforts. Not to tell them to shut up, because it is embrassing you. The best way to influence people is through encouragements and complements.

    Just cuz someone is angry, does not mean that he is a loser and getting no girls. By posting “compliants” here also does not necessarily mean that he is not taking any steps. Maybe he did, but got shot down, and venting… It is a fucking hard process. We all need encouragements. To prove some of you wrong: I probably sound to you guys like I am a loser who can’t find a date, hence the anger. But you know what, I was just with a cute black girl last weekend, and I date many girls… Yet I am still angry.

    The people that have low self esteem have become like that over many years of negative experiences. We cannot expect them to read an article, a comment here and all of a sudden becomes a different person. Like I said before, telling a smoke addict to “You need to stop smoking. Why can’t you stop smoking, you are stupid and weak.” deosn’t really help.

    I was a very late bloomer myself (and still learning). Maybe we out to be a little more soft on our brothers, and have some paitence.

  13. You know, the interesting thing is that there are two ways people grow. Some of them grow by actually being criticized. They take it as a challenge, and fight back to prove that they can do it. Then, there are others who aren’t as tough. They need encouragement and support to grow. Read the end of this article, and I kind of get into it: http://singleasianmale.com/?p=436

    When we start up a conversation on this site, it’s to get different perspectives. Some of you SAMs are confident and well-assimilated, while others aren’t. We need to speak to all of you. A good way to do that is to keep it open ended. Contro was actually being silly writing this article, and though he might have some complaints, his actions speak louder than words. He dates girls from all ethnicities, and he’s a funny, charming dude.

    But, it is true. This is rehashed stuff. Some of you readers are newer than others. We can’t always write to the old crowd as we do get new readers, so we sometimes have to cover old ground for them. Redundancy can get boring, but sometimes it’s important to review old material.

  14. In this society there are less support for those who challenge the waves and forge ahead and go where none has gone, than support for those who need help.

    The balance is dangerously shifted to the latter. The innovators are choking and dying of stagnant dismay.

  15. About the Garlic part FC, you need to up your tea drinking. As much as a Korean Martial arts master eats his kimchee, he doesn’t smell. Because he’s guzzling tea by the gallons…

    If you’re gonna be asian bo and eat asian, you gotta do the rest to be the cool asian.

  16. Jet_Aries, dude—I’m sorry you’re very affected by all of this.

    But being full of anger isn’t healthy and it isn’t an attractive quality to women. Having a chip on your shoulder or being a hot head doesn’t help. I’m not saying you have to like this social dynamic–hell, I don’t either–but I don’t dwell on this.

    Besides, what would you have all of us SAM’s or AA’s do? You say we need to get angry and all, but to do what? Confront and prevent SAFs from dating who they want? To physically attack white and black dudes for dating “our” women? Like I said before, you can’t change others, you can only change yourself.

    Look, I’m not trying to be an asshole about this, I am trying to help and provide encouragement by suggesting there are better ways to channel one’s energies. Life is too short to be pissed off about a social dynamic you can’t change. And if you’re dating, great! You’re in the game, so enjoy your time rather than having this deep seated resentment against SAF’s who don’t date SAM’s. Sure, we’ve all been hurt and frustrated at times. But life moves on, it doesn’t stop because we failed (whether it was our fault or not). And you’re right, it isn’t easy. But learn from your bad times and move forward being a bit wiser.

    There are no guarantees in life, only possibilities. What you make of those life possibilities and opportunities is entirely up to you. But at least have some fun before they shovel dirt on your face.

  17. Thanks, Mojo. I understand and agree with what you had to say.

    I am not angry at the AFs. I am angry at the fact that why we have to work so much harder, why we have to jump all those hoops to date girls here in the States, and why we have a smaller pool to work with.

    I agree with you that there is very few things we can do to influence others. The best way to change our situation is by improving ourselves, which I will continue to work on.

    Thanks!

  18. By talking all kinds of things on this issue though… is changing the seemingly unchangable social dynamic. Changes take time and energy spent by human interaction.

  19. Think about the psychology of this poor white guy.

    He goes out of his way to conjure up more than ten things on a list to slam asians whom he fears deep deep down to the point of paranoia.

    He’s busy distracting himself all day long in his pathetic life and one day…..I would not want to be him.

    SAMs! You’ve really got nothing standing in your way but youselves.

  20. Jet,

    perhaps I could’ve said things better in my posts. I’m glad you understand what I was getting at, despite my not properly expressing my point. I just don’t want to see a bunch of SAM’s sitting around, stewing in their own anger and I was trying to motivate those who are still struggling to get going in life. I guess that’s why I took a harsher tone.

    Trust me, I fully understand where you’re coming from. But we gotta move forward and keep putting ourselves out there. And if our social dynamic is that we have a small pool to work with, then it’s up to us to EXPAND our individual social pool and network. That won’t happen if you practice self-segregation or stay indoors getting hammered with your friends playing video games all nite long.

    Get active! Start working on yourselves! Involve yourself with some co-ed activities (eg, volleyball, softball leagues, etc…) so you can meet people. Go into these activities with no expectations, just be really casual and open to meeting new people and making new friends. You never know if you don’t try. And sometimes you’ll find your ethnicity doesn’t mean a thing to some people—they’re interested in you because of who you ARE. So let’s not be so self-conscious about being Asian, just simply…be. You just have to find the places where you’ll succeed, not places where you’re destined to fail.

    And as much as I say this to all the SAM’s who aren’t further along, I also say this to myself too when things aren’t going as well as I’d like.

  21. I understand you need to vent, but most Asian women (and Non-Asian women) worth having think the nerdy Asian male non-entity stereotype is a load of deluded crap, possibly motivated by fear of Asian economic, political and hopefully social ascendency. Please consider compiling a list of why Asian women love Asian men. For me it would go:

    1. Great skin, hair and eye colour (this is how you spell it in Canada)
    2. Not too tall (usually)
    3. Down to earth and laid back
    4. Hard working as hell
    5. Resilient as hell
    6. Family oriented
    7. More racially and socially aware than Caucasian men are apt to be.
    8. Were not raised to expect that everything in life would come easy, so they appreciate everything they receive and respect what they and other like them earned by the sweat of their brow.

    Off the cuff, with love.

  22. Who wants women who think this way anyway? They have self-esteem issues if they stereotype entire races and are looking for someone to fill that personal void. B

  23. Contro SAM I agree with BrightRedFruit and write about the Asian women who supports and loves the Asian man. Enough of the sell out self haters.

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