It seems there is a naive way of thinking amongst SAMs and other Asians. They feel that once they are married, they are complete. In other words: Marriage = Happiness. Once they are married, the nagging mom will stop, and she will be SO happy for you. Once you are married, you will be in bliss, and everyday will be full of love and laughter. Bullshit.
If anything, that’s when the challenges start! When you’re married, you and your spouse will spend everyday dealing with each other’s issues. When you’re in a serious relationship where you can’t run, you really have to deal with the demons. I’ve seen a lot of married people who are constantly battling each other. You wonder why they even got together. But, it makes sense because only a few of us will marry someone who is so compatible that everyday will be pleasure.
And, consider yourself lucky if your family likes who you marry. Chances are, there will be issues with your mom and her, or your dad or sister or somebody in your clan. Or, her parents are hard to get along with for you. Further, you’ll feel the pressure to provide grandkids, and visit the family more often. Once you have kids, you’ll be changing diapers when you really want to join your SAM buddies online for a game of HALO 10.
Further, the divorce rate last I heard in the US is about 50%!!! Granted, Asians tend to be more traditional and stay together even if they aren’t getting along. But, as we get more Americanized, you probably won’t want to settle for an incompatible spouse when you see all that hot booty walking around. So, again, marriage isn’t the cure all. Once you’re married, you’re off the market, and you can’t touch the merchandise anymore, unless you really want to wreck your marriage. A lot of guys have problems with this, not to mention ladies. So, really enjoy your single life before you get married. Carpe Deim, SAMs!
I know as SAMs and AAs, it’s tough when you have that traditional thinking, nagging mom on your back, but really think about this. The good that will come out of it is that you won’t be that desperate guy/girl who is thinking about marriage on the first date. That’s a major turn-off, and it prevents you from enjoying the moment, and showing your natural, relaxed self. Instead, you’ll have a realistic perspective where you understand that marriage isn’t a goal, it’s an outcome of dating someone who is compatible, spending long hours with them, and finally committing because you finally feel like settling down and changing diapers.