Yes, this is a myth. This is simply not true. If this were the case, SAMs in America will be extinct in 50 years! 
I’ve heard comments from white girls, and they aren’t opposed to dating Asian at all. They just say that no Asian guys have ever asked them out, so they never had the opportunity. See! We do it to ourselves, boys! The number of Asian guys who ask Caucasian girls out is very small, and that is why the success rate is also small. If more SAMs become confident, and ask more girls of other ethnicities out, then there will be more action period.
I mean, what’s there not to like? Lately, it’s cool to have shaved legs, arms, and chests. We have that naturally! We are clean and well-groomed. We are understanding, and most of us are good listeners. All we need is a little more cocky attitude, and start asking more girls out! The current imbalance is due to the fact that men in other cultures are very aggressive, and asking these girls out while we are busy playing Nintendo in our bedroom with other SAMs. And, that’s why Asian girls are dating out of their race; they are tired of waiting for SAM to ask them out.
No related posts.
Dude… I went to LA for a conference, and met a bunch of girls, and lots of them thought I was hot. Believe me guys. There are LOTS of white girls waiting for a rice stick. The funny thing with those girls is that a lot of them have Asian boyfriends, but the girls had to approach them first! We gotta change this, guys. Pathetic. The white girls can hunt better than we can…
I was on a Train to NYC once and there was this Russian girl: cute, red hair, and had a set to match. She was looking at me smiling. Unfortunately, I was too much of a pussy to do anything about it. Eastern European girl, especially the slim ones really dig Asian guys. So get your confident up and go get them. Forget them stuck-up bitches.
DUDE! You missed your chance to taste Russian???? Oh, man…
Yeah, man. EVERYONE of us have moments where we were too afraid to go after a girl, even when the light was green! Remember those moments and let that fuel you so you don’t do it again. You will get another chance!
“white girls don’t like asian men….who are idiots.”
this topic really hits home with me; i’ve dated both asian and white girls and really there isn’t much of a difference. well, the white girls are more physically developed, but otherwise no other significant difference.
race isn’t an issue here (unless you’ve come across a rare racist); it’s more mutual attraction and following through when you get a sign. that dude on the train should’ve gone up to her to say hello…even if he didn’t reciprocate her smile. funny how asians don’t smile much; is this due to straight A crazy parents?
anyway, forget the superficial things like your race (don’t be an idiot) and pursue her. you’ve got nothing to lose.
There’s one big difference: Asian girls have Asian parents. One set is all I can handle. Can I get an amen?
Amen.
Its true tho, russian girls love us asian men. Anyways, the reason I don’t ask white girls out is not because I’m not confident or afraid or anything. Its that I just plain think asian women are better looking. I mean I would much rather go for an asian girl than a white one, its not about being too shy to ask them out at all.
I’m white and a dedicated dater of Asian men – I leave those big, gross, hairy white guys to the Asian women. But after much frustration I’ve mostly given up on Asian-Americans, and mostly date Mainland Chinese guys, who are very sexually confident. When I try to flirt with Asian-American men, I get one of three reactions: 1. Eek! A woman is hitting on me! *Scuttles away* 2. “You’re hot and I’m flattered, but I’m not into white girls.” Fine if it’s aesthetic like the guy above – hey, I’m not attracted to white people either – but often it’s derived from racial/cultural snobbery and superiority. Asian-Americans stereotype whites as much as white Americans stereotype A-As. 3. We do go out, and the guy won’t stop obsessing over, “Oh my god, I can’t believe I’ve landed a pretty white girl!” Which gets annoying so I dump him.
“white girls don’t like asian men….who are idiots.” Exactly.
Lots of white American women have commented to me that they’re very attracted to Asian men (as well they should be!), only they never get an opportunity to date them.
Actually, a lot of my Asian-American girlfriends cite a similar reason for dating white guys. “Asian men are too much work.” So, guys, step up to the plate! I’m rooting for y’all.
Yes! I’m so glad you found our site, Shanghai Meimi! Your perspective is invaluable to us, it really is. I was surprised that you wrote that you ‘mostly date Mainland Chinese guys, who are very sexually confident’. Would you say those guys are very common??? How about Korean and Japanese guys?
But, I agree that Asian Americans act like you stated. Typical SAM behavior! SOOOO typical. We’re trying to change all that so you can find more dates!
Besides the fact that you like Asian guys’ physical traits, what other things have you noticed about them that you like?
I would say most Mainland men have the same majority, we’re in charge, slightly oblivious to their own faults confidence that the average white American guy does. There is a shy minority, like anywhere, but they’re small. What makes Chinese men most insecure is their financial status, and that is what women here judge them by. I dislike this, but I’m not a Chinese woman.
Japanese men are SO culturally different from Chinese that I find them really hard to relate to much. The one Korean man I know is, contrary to the stereotype, super sweet but even shyer than your average A-A. So I don’t have much perspective to proffer.
I really find it impossible to generalize about Asians, or even just about Chinese. I like northern Chinese for their intense opinionatedness (although it gets old fast), eastern Chinese for their easy, laid-back directness, and southerners for their obsessive practicality. And that already overgeneralizes. Asian-Americans are *completely* different from Asians. As a geeky, knowledge-obsessed overachiever, I grew up with mostly A-A friends, so there’s a comfort factor there. Plus I quite *like* the self-effacing, polite respectfulness of A-A guys, at least they’ll have a conversation instead of trying to hump your leg or something. The problem is that most A-A guys combine those charming aspects with extreme insecurity, mommy issues, racism and banana baggage.
HI
a few things about myself, i just turned 19, not trying to be an elitist but I really feel like im the asian guy that stands out in a crowd, 6’2″, well built; i like to workout, dress in the sexiest clothing possible without looking gay, if u ask me which celebrity I look like, i’d say Adam Levine. not to mention my mercedes-benz also flatters my dates.
I just have this huge thing for white girls, redheads blondes brunettes, I just find them soooo sexy, they turn me on, mostly because i went to highschool in a very rich neighborhood and there’s just nothing but white girls(sadly there was like 1% black people i wonder why). Although i’ve got turned down many times by white girls I still love flirting with them, i’ve been close to one or two asian girls my age in the past few years, but i just didnt feel the attraction and they were not that fun to hangout with (very honest opinion).
My girlfriend is irish/german, i love everything about her, although i have a lot of homework (college undergrad), I’ve been staying up very late/allnighters to do my homework just so i can spend a lot of time with her. I act completely different when i am with my girlfriend, her gentleness soothes me and I stop caring for all the things that are going on in the world. Being in love is beautiful im sure i dont need to repeat that.
OK~ apart from all that useless bullshit. all i want to say is that all the guys out there, not just asian guys, you have to know what is it that you want, and you have to go get it no matter what it takes. Stop blaming your race/stereotypes, or other people, it is you. go hit the gym, work on your charisma, some people are humorous and some are not, just relax and laugh with her if you are not, and if your parents arent loaded
go earn money and spend it on your girl not because you want her to sleep with you but because you love her. if you only like the way the white girls look, that’s fine with me, just go get em, there are a plenty of girls that need someone to love them, someone to have a fun time with, don’t be afraid, because charm is in all of you.
shanghai Meimi:
Shanghai might not be the best place if you want to meet the fine muscular men, go to northeast china hehe
The way men should dress, in my opinion, has been so mis-understood, BY MEN. What i am trying to say is, there’s a fine line between gay and sex appealing. Our society for the most part are used to having women attract men with looks, people forget that women also can pick who she want to be with. start experimenting on your own appearance. remember if you are not physically fit wearing a smaller sized shirt might not be the best of ideas. good luck! P.S: I think guys with long hair that covers part of their face look retarded, to me it seems that they are not confident, and lack masculinity.
Hey Good posts BBC. I personally think you make a lot of sense. It comes down to preference, and nobody should stop you from pursuing what you like. Due to our environment, culture, and personality, people like different types.
I also agree that you need to experiment. Your personality and style, even later in life, is dynamic and can be changed at will. Everybody is a work of art in the making, and it’s up to you to make choices to improve those things that you aren’t satisfied with. I think a lot of SAMs don’t experiment enough or study themselves enough. I personally find it motivating to learn and grow.
white women ‘hunted’ better because they do not have any negative stereotypes. You’re asian, I would have thought you’d figured this out…guess not.
is this whole post supposed to make asian guys feel better? hahahaha!
I’m white and I’ve also dated many men. Every Asian man I have dated I have had to go up to them and be the one to hit on them. But then the relationship does always go on and then I find them lieing.I date mostly men from HK. And I have dated other races, right now I’m dating a Nepali guy. But I find that he is also starting to lie. I’m very loud but also friendly and whenever I try to tell them my true feelings they avoid the subject. Is there any way on telling a Asian guy on how I’m feelings without scaring the crap out of him?
@kimi
Well, you have to understand, many asian men or actually men in general are not used to being approached by a woman, it’s usually the other way around. A friend of mine told me once he was at a bar with his friend during the 4th of july weekend, and all of a sudden they were approached by two hot blondes. My friend says he’s never been approached by a woman before (even though he’s a good looking white guy, but still), although he did tell me it’s the holiday and I guess there are some women that just want to get laid. He also had a feeling these women were getting back at their boyfriends because they wouldn’t stop talking about them. I’m curious though if these women would’ve approached my friends if they were asian (because my friends already had girlfriends and said no to these women).
@kimi
I may be off base, but lots of HK guys/gals are very insular, meaning they really like to stick to their own. If you are approaching them, they will probably be interested in hanging out, but in the backs of their minds I think a lot of the guys are thinking ‘i have to be with a HK girl, so this cannot last’.
I’m curious what you mean by ‘lying’. In general, Asians aren’t as expressive as Americans, so they probably won’t be able to open up even if they wanted to. That’s very cool you’re open to dating these guys. I guess the only advice I would say is that being too open/loud can turn some personalities off, especially if they are the quieter type. Also, guys have this strange reverse psychology where the more attention they get from a girl, the more they take it for granted and/or lose interest. For some reason, I was like that when I was younger.
Most Asian guys are so timid and wimpy looking. Get the Asians ‘Made In Trinidad “, they’re built tough and big.. lol
“henry Says:
January 12th, 2011 at 12:34 pm
is this whole post supposed to make asian guys feel better? hahahaha!”
Yes, do tell us about your dating preferences as a white female.
“Pat C Says:
May 16th, 2011 at 3:27 pm
Most Asian guys are so timid and wimpy looking. Get the Asians ‘Made In Trinidad “, they’re built tough and big.. lol”
They are not “timid and wimpy looking”, they are just shy. There is a difference. Unlike other teens, a lot of Asian American teens were forced to remain celibate for much of their school life, and thus, they just do not have any game.
I’ve dated a white girl back in high school like in 2001. She was LOL 5″7 at that time, and I was only 5″4. Dated her for like 2 weeks.
Broke up with her because I was never attracted to white woman. She liked me and asked me out so I went along and see where it went. Ever since then, i’ve only dated Chinese and Vietnamese + Korean woman.
Also, too many stereotypes about us, not all asian males are bad, same could be said for every other race.
Yeah, we can be over protective and shy at times but same could be said for every other race.
When it comes down to it, it depends on the guys. Got it ladies?
Some white women are attractive, but I’m not really interested due to certain issues:
1. cultural differences
2. they don’t age as well as Asians
3. they tend to get fat by the time they’re 30
Well, I admit Asian guys are attractive, but one thing that comes to my mind in the first place is their religions. I’m not here to stereotype but I’ve researched that a lot of Asians are atheists/Buddhists and others. I’m Christian and I am hard of hearing. I’ve dated a hard of hearing Korean guy but that time I never really thought about getting interested in Asians. By the time after we decided to be friends, I found out that Asians are the type people I like but being a true Christian I want to let God lead me to a man who He thinks is the best for me. I read a lot of people’s stereotypes about Asians. I wonder if we all are the same race, will stereotype ever existed? Pardon me for my poor English, but may God bless you all!
@Natalya
If you want a Christian Asian guy, date Koreans. 50% of South Korea is Christian from what I’ve heard, and I know lots of Korean Americans who are Christian and go to church regularly.
Is this a freaking joke? “– I leave those big, gross, hairy white guys to the Asian women. ” , “I was on a Train to NYC once and there was this Russian girl: cute, red hair, and had a set to match. She was looking at me smiling. Unfortunately, I was too much of a pussy to do anything about it. Eastern European girl, especially the slim ones really dig Asian guys. So get your confident up and go get them. Forget them stuck-up bitches.”
^ This is probably why, us white girls don’t date asian guys. This the most creepiest, pathetic thing I have ever seen. Grow up. And I like the “BIG, HAIRY?, WHITE GUYS.” This is beyond weird. Are you guys not happy with you’re own race, is it the pressure from western culture? I just can’t get over how weird this is. By the way almost all white families don’t appreciate their daughters dating other races other then white. SO good luck.
Ella Schmidt, Ms. Stuckup Old Money, perhaps some of us Asian American dudes grew up in predominantly white areas (90% or more) and are attracted to caucasians? I mean you could say that I’m a wordly white dude who speaks some Japanese and Mandarin trapped in the body of a short muscular Asian American male martial artist.
Also whoever said anything about marrying? Some people don’t want to marry nor do they want to have children. Ever heard of cohabiting? Ever heard of just you and me? No kids to worry about? Anyways good luck finding your blonde hair blue eyed 6’4″ bodybuilder hunk who will sweep you off your feet and fuck you silly every night. That is until you turn 38 and start to lose your looks and your precious marriage falls apart.
Ella Schmidt thinks that putting down SAMs will get her a hunky white guy.
Sorry, your hunky white guys are playing you off against “tight” “submissive” “sweet” Asian women (ahahaha)… and they may not have/may not want to give you the resources to see you through married life.
Tell us about that “sisterhood” between women again, Ella, I’m all ears
So I figure you’ll get knocked up, and then later try for an Asian guy (“ooh, you are so chivalrous, educated and smart! I love SAMs! I totally would have dated you decades ago” … which is easy to say when you never have to live up to your words).
Well I’m asin mixed with malay,chinese and japanese and yeah I’m single! And I think all girls in this world are beautiful and special in their own way,had a girlfriend for a year she was my first things didn’t turn out well but it was the best for both of us to move on.Now I’m seacrhing for that special one who knows she might be browsing right now reading my comments? She could be the one?
always have a positive mindset Asian dudes out there if we have that we’ll run this mother fucking world cheers to that!
Ella Schmidt is a White man posing as a woman.
@Kimi
Honestly, I don’t get why the guys are running away from you. Myself especially and a couple of buddies of mine both SAM and white would pretty much stop everything if we ran into a woman that made the first move and showed some blatant sexual or romantic interest; unless she had a horrific way of doing it I guess. Like walking up and nutchecking us or something would fall in that category.
Im chinese, grew up in Australia. I have only ever dated caucasian girls.
i got rejected many times but i kept going. just a number’s game.
anyways long story short, now im engaged to an irish-scottish burmese girl.
sure if white girls looks older then their age
sure if they tend to gain weight when they hit 30
but then again, having half asian half white is the best of both world.
I think Asian men are absolutely gorgeous !
I’m a white woman and I would definitely date an Asian guy. The only problem I have is that I would be unaccepted by his parents.
I’m a mostly white woman (part Native American), and Asian males have always been the most physically attractive to me, since I was a prepubescent little girl. Having lived most of my dating years in Latino, black, and caucasian-dominated cities, I’ve rarely had the chance to even become friends with Asian males, much less found opportunities to date them.
Also, this is total bullshit: “By the way almost all white families don’t appreciate their daughters dating other races other then white. SO good luck.”
True, there are some white families like that, but it’s rare, and the rest of the families look at them and think “WTF is wrong with you?”
My parents have always told me to “find a nice Japanese man to marry”, since the time I was about 7 years old. I just never listened because I’m a tomboy and believed that looking for marriage was a stupid idea, and that it wasn’t something to be forced or sought after.
I am American-born Chinese, but look like a normal Chinese teen. But this white girl liked me soooo much she said she was tired of all the white guys and she wanted something else. So I went out with her for a week but unfortunately she had very small tits, ate Old Bay seasoning straight out of the can at school, was super skinny, and very very clingy… and not to mention trying to kiss me like the 2nd day of our relationship… now she has cut her hair and she looks like a man………..
And then I went on a date with this really hot American-born Asian girl who spoke perfect English, had big eyes, beautiful hair, big breasts, a nice butt, and the prettiest face ever… she was like 5’4″. But I ended up in the friend zone..
So… all you other SAMs, white girls will date you… it has nothing to do with your race. If a white girl doesn’t want to date you because of your race, then it should stay that way because you wouldn’t want a person who stereotypes people based on their race, anyway… so they basically eliminate themselves.
…I just want to know that when boys here say that white girls do like Asian boys…are you ABC type Asians? (ABC: America Born Chinese)
I am An asian boy from Asia. I mean, I have Asian culture and Asian’s way of thinking and seeing about things. Every thing about me is PURE ASIAN. I do not jave any American culture inside me even though I accept lives and food and culture here.
Do White girls really like pure Asian boys? (I know the way I say PURE is funny, but just to set a line between an Asian growes up here compares to an Asian growes up in Asia.)
I do like white girls…but it was kind of hard for me to ask a white girls out. Or, even though we went out for fun, but it is only as frind, never gets into a relationship.
How to get a white girl to WANT to be with me? I have girlfriends before, but those were before I came to USA.
I’m an Aussie girl who is dating a boy from HK and he is lovely
I am shy and don’t think I would ever approach a guy even from my own race, but luckily enough I was able to catch on to all the (extremely) subtle hints he dropped that he liked me. So yeah, you don’t even have to be overly forthright about getting a Caucasian girl you just have to do SOMETHING. Also, I have a friend who likes Asian guys but she thinks they will never go for her because she is curvy. Ive never had to worry about this as im short and slim, but is she correct that it will be an issue for her??
Amber,
Tell you friend Asian guys love all girls. After all they are men. My advice to your friend. Just give proximity to the guy.
If she simply stands next to him, he may get the idea or hint.
@Amber
Cool to hear women like yourself are attracted to asian guys. I’m an good looking asian guy and white women have flirted with me big time, however when I pursue, they’re not interested. Unless if the chick is really intoxicated, most women don’t like to be hit on (especially if you’re really hot) because they get guys coming on to them all the time (I bet even unattractive women get flirted). My advice to guys, if a girl smiles at you or is very friendly, amplify it instead of being your boring usual self, and have that don’t care attitude (because you don’t want to be too nice, you’ll look like a wuss). Women like chivalry or if you’re talented with something.
Iuno man sometimes the opposite is true when your a good lookin guy. I can’t tell you how many damn times I just wanna do my own thing and girls come at you like your the only guy with the parachute. I got a pal said that’s the “Jerk Effect.” If your good lookin and don’t give a girl the time of day she’ll swoon all over you.
Sometimes jerks get more girls, but it’s the decent men who get to actually keep the girl, especially after the teen years and early twenties, when both genders have matured a bit and better understand what they want in a partner.
@Everest: Culture is a difficult question to answer, because it’s very difficult to understand a culture that you haven’t been exposed to directly. I think that every relationship involves learning about the background of your partner and the values of your partner, and balancing those things against what you want in life. If they don’t balance out, somehow, it doesn’t work. I don’t think it’s any different in the case of culture. You learn each other’s cultures and values and determine if you can make it as a couple.
This was from another Asian guy on another website. If somebody 5’11 and cut and muscular and making good money and fairly talented is having trouble, then what does that say for the rest of us who may not be as tall or whatever?
—–
Most of what you say is unfortunately true. Discrimination against Asian men in America is silent and vicious. It has become very apparent to me in the past few years as I have experience so much of it in my social and professional life.
There are studies and stats that support this, and I’m not talking about some trivial stats off some dating site. Take a look at this study:
http://tierneylab.blogs.nytimes.com/2007/04/13/single-female-seeking-same-race-male/
The disturbing thing is the participants of this study are educated women from Columbia University who apparently are only interested in gold-digging off an Asian man.
Look up interracial marriage statistics. The latest statistics for the US show that 25% of Asian women marriages are with a non-Asian husband. Also, there are 3x more marriages between an Asian women and a non-Asian man than there are marriages between an Asian man and a non-Asian wife. In the UK, British Chinese women are twice as likely to marry someone outside their race than British Chinese men.
I’ve experience a great deal of difficulty with women over the past few years myself, and I don’t even match the Asian stereotype. Many say Asian men are unattractive due to physical inferiorities; however, I’m 5’11″, which is taller the average caucasian male in the U.S. I’m also an extremely cut 175 lbs, and outlift most guys in the gym. Lastly, according to those shady penis size statistics, I’m significantly more endowed than the average black man, but this doesn’t really matter because I can’t even make it that far with women. I’m Southern Chinese by decent, and I don’t have stereotype slit Asian eyes. My eyes are as large as a typical white man’s, and I have double eye lids. I also graduated among the top in my class at a top University in the states. I make good money. And, beyond all this superfcial crap, I use to be a good guy. I treated girls with respect and courtesy. Nevertheless, I’ve been spurned many times by women who pass me for white men who in a number of cases were older, balding and shorter. I’m typically rejected before there is time for the girl to even gauge personalities, so it’s purely superficial. If I manage to get a date with an attractive girl, I normally get dumped after they realize I’m not a doctor, lawyer, or some important millionaire.
Racism has destroyed the image of the Asian man. There’re so many prejudices that a woman has to get over before she will consider going out with an Asian guy. I know there are a lot of girls out there that like Asian guys, but the fact is that this is a minority. Guys and girls take pride in who their partner is, and pop culture tells women that it is embarassing to be with an Asian guy because he is inferior to the men of other races.
Honestly, I think this is too big to fight. The best thing you can do is find something else in life that you can love, and hopefully bring you success. Girls may never like you, but they can love your succes